31st January - Waiting

Aye. Everyone's been asking me about my blood eye. A blood vessel probably burst when I coughed back when I was sick, and it stained the top right quarter of my eye. I didn't even feel anything though. I just looked in the mirror and 'Damn wat'. It's entirely harmless though. It just stays there because there's no filter in between the eye membranes to suck out the blood so I just have to wait for it to decompose slowly. In my eye. Where nothing is supposed to come in or out. You know. Just leaving residue there. Yep.
Final Year Project's almost done. Truth is, I have no idea what to do now, since the programmers have been abysmally slow. In fact, I think most of the time I do my game design stuff with my class here it's the programmers that lag far behind near the end. Which is problematic because I only know what we're missing right at the last minute. I'm hoping they really buck up and improve their skills. In the Global Game Jam, sure we made like, 3 games, with our huge team. But each of them sucked in comparison to the other teams. Hell, a team of 4 programmers made a better game and us. And the Freshmen. Oh shit, they beat our ass good. My art didn't really get to shine too. I did a rush job. Well, sure, I guess I really need improvement in keeping up quality together with speed. I've been seeing a lot of artists just shooting out works almost daily. Realized some were Singaporean. I am super ashamed of myself, I want to do the same but I have no idea where to start. My arts seem to come out based on how lucky my first few strokes are. If only there was some way...

My hormones have been getting the better of me recently. I've been trying to think straight but they're derailing me to horniness every few minutes. It's so annoying. I'm trying to be a gentleman here but it's hard. Not literally I mean. Okay, maybe some times. And I want to complain about it sometimes, but I don't want anyone I know to know I'm feeling unnecessarily horny on twitter or facebook.
Still sick. Rather, unwell. There're infinite lumps of phlegm in my throat. It's like they just built a neighbourhood in my diaphragm. Tch. How troublesome.

26th January - Game Jam

I've been naming so many of my files with underscores instead of spaces that I screwed up the title of this post quite a few times.

I'm in the Global Game Jam right now. 48 hours straight of game making. And with the all-star team from ITE, save for about 4 people, it was really exciting to get to work. It was really hard getting used to leading 15-odd people, but I pulled through kinda. Once we got started, dividing the roles between so many of us made the word seem a hell of a lot easier :D

But now we're stuck with problems like code glitches, or lack of programming ability, or just not enough time to do the sprites. I'm the only one awake right now. Wide awake. Strangely. It's like as if my body does not recognize fatigue. I feel a bit light-headed, and even while typing this post I'm getting his with dizzy spells with rapid succession. I should rest, but there's lots to do. Ngghhh... I'm gonna endure as much as I can before I hit the sack. If I ever do.

Back to work. I'll elaborate more next time.

24th January - Shutdown

I thought I'd be well enough to head to school today, but as I reached the bus stop I got hit with this crippling stomachache. It was insane. I've had one of these before, and I knew the solution. But I hated the solution. Luckily I walked my sad arse back home instead of boarding the bus that just arrived.The pain would start as a mild irritation. Then it would escalate. Slowly. Gradually. It when from the kind of pain when someone would just tap and hold on a bruise, to someone just smashing it in and holding it there. It wasn't gastric, I think. It felt like the outside of my stomach was being stabbed, or being burned by acid, more than the inside of my stomach. I went from just groaning in pain to screaming and hitting hard objects to take my mind off it. My thought process wasn't clear in the least. In the middle of the pains I get a few opportunities to try and diagnose my own condition, but of course, being in intense pain, they were all absurd and all wrong. Diarrhea wouldn't help. I shot out like 3 loads in quick succession. The solution. Was puking. No idea how that worked. I didn't like it. But eventually I couldn't stand the pain and proceeded to fill the toilet bowl with the remains of my ham sandwich breakfast. My nose and mouth stank of puke, but I was just happy to be free from the pain. Another trip to the doctor, who seemed to dismiss it as trivial, and I was set with two more drugs to add to my daily diet. My body's really shutting down, huh. I just hope it doesn't get any worse. At least now I think I might be lucky enough to head back to school tomorrow. There's the Global Game Jam after all. I'd hate to miss the chance to pit myself against Singapore's Game Designers.

Apart from those new symptoms, a blood vessel broke in my eye so my left eye is red. I don't feel anything, but it sure looks ugly. People might think I was absent from school because of this. Also, some KT Tape on my arm to help my wrist. It looks like a cast, so that might lead to more misunderstandings.

I'm going to head to bed now. My body needs rest, and if my dream continues like it has the past few days, tonight's the night I get trained to use my powers. Whatever they are. But I'm excited. For some reason.

23rd January - Ill

Oops, it seems I've neglected this blog again. Trying to hide it from prying eyes on my laptop has led me to accidentally hide it from myself as well. Hahaha, oh well.

Back to school, and life proceeds as normal. I thought we had a lot left to do for our Final Year Project, but surprisingly, after coming back from the holidays after that stressful rush period we had prior to it, there's actually little left to be done. I'm actually quite amazed. We might actually make it to what we were aiming for, although still, too far from the full, actual game. But hey, Kinect's a university level programming language. It's amazing we got this far, even. Most of my work's pretty much done. Not sure if it's because I've been working fast or that I just tasked myself the easy jobs. Anyway, I better salvage more stuff for me to do or it'll appear as if I'm slacking. Which, most of the time I am. So...

I fell ill about several weeks back. I recovered for a period of time after seeing the doctor, but then I fell sick again. Even worse this time, from just a regular phlegmy, bothersome cough, to a full-on fever, together with that phlegmy, bothersome cough and dypsnea. At first, it was diagnosed as bronchitis. Now, the doctor's not entirely sure, he chucked at me two different kinds of antibiotics, and prays that it works this time. Because if they don't, and I continue to get worse, the only other option could be lymphoma... Which is cancer. Strangely, I don't feel that sense of impending doom, so I doubt it is cancer, but I'm pretty sure anyone who has gotten cancer didn't expect it either. I'm hoping I'll recover from this illness, since I have shit to accomplish, but even if I did get cancer, I'm saving an epic leaving scenario for my friends and family. It'll be sad, but I'll be remembered as the guy who can never be taken seriously.

Cheh, I shouldn't think so much about death. Maybe it's only when I think I'm going to die that I come here to rant on in a little blog post.